Quit being a jerk to yourself.

17 February 2011

I’m nicer to myself than most I think. 

My friend Danielle once, in the middle of a conversation about self esteem, told me that I have something that most women don’t.  That conversation was almost a year ago and it sticks with me even now.  I was sitting around the the table with a group of fabulous women, great friends of mine.  Every one of them, by anyone’s standards, are much more gorgeous, thin, younger, and more stylish than myself and I was the only one who wasn’t picking at my flaws.  More than that, I could not fathom how it was possible that they didn’t see magnificence in themselves.

Oh, I have flaws and I recognize what they are.  I’m fat.  I’m bossy.  Pregnancy makes my usually flawless freckled skin break out.  I wear pajamas half the week.  My house is tiny by most standards.  My feet are big.  I’m a loud mouth.  My hair is usually a freakish mess.  I try to constantly fix things that sometimes can’t be fixed.  I have a short fuse.  I’m stubborn.

And I still LIKE LOVE myself.  Every single bit, even the wobbly ones.

I am a good mom despite having bad days.  I am a loving, endlessly devoted wife even on days when I want to strangle him.  I have a husband that would go to the ends of the Earth for me.  I have pretty blue eyes.  I look hot in a dress and makeup… fatness and all.  I am growing a human being in my uterus.  My house might be small, true, but people feel at home here.  That tiny house payment also makes it possible for me to stay home with Finn.  I’m intelligent.  I’m funny.  I am amazing in bed.  I am honest.  I have loads of friends who would walk across hot coals to be there for me.  I am a great cook.  Want me to go on?  Because I really like myself. 

Why wouldn’t I?  I’m fucking fabulous. 


But, if you don’t believe it, who will? 

Open your mouth, even if you’ve never commented on anything before and tell me… tell the world… what do you love about yourself? 


Bunny @ 86n It said...

I'm counting myself as one of the "hot coals" friends, even though I mess up sometimes.

What I love about myself? I'm hardworking. I think I'm pretty funny. I'm creative. Oh, and I have nice legs!

Samantha said...

Great post! I am definitely one of the ones who are always picking themselves apart.

Hmmm. I love that I can multitask like nobody's business! And that I am great at my job (well, most of the time!).

Furry Bottoms said...

I know my flaws, and I am always banging my head against the wall for them. I rock the boat for other people all the time and its stupid. I don't know why I do it except... I have this thing where I stand by what I firmly believe in, whatever the cost.

We had a crook of a manager where I used to work. I called him out on it... which eventually led to his getting fired from the job. WHY DID I DO THAT?!! I was the only one who spoke up out of 100 people. He and I had a screaming match once over it and well, I have my regrets. But at least I stood by what I believed in.

Unknown said...

Ok this really made me think and it took forever to think of something. I am a jerk to myself, always criticizing myself about everything. That needs to change, so thank you:)

After starring at the computer screen for what seemed like hours this is what I came up with.........I love that I can keep calm and cool when things get a little crazy, especially when it comes to the kids. If they get hurt or something I tend to stay calm, my heart is racing and I can feel my body shaking but in the moment I stay pretty calm and take care of what needs to be taken care of.

Meg said...

Awesome post to read after I've been so down on myself as of late. I think you're awesome, amazing, and reading this post makes me think/know you are super hot. I had a guy tell me once that confidence is the hottest thing a chick can have.

You know what I love about myself? I'm funny... DAMN funny most of the time and I'm getting funnier as I grow up (or do I say 'age' now that I'm 26?). You know what else I love about myself... I landed a husband who told me last night he loved my body no matter what size it is (even if I think that size is HUGE).

MommyLisa said...

I love my eyes, I think I have pretty lips and cute TINY ears. I LIKE that my house is small, but I wish some projects were finished so I could invite people over again! I love that my hubby tries to take care of all the "bad stuff" and I love my daughter and how much she loves EVERYONE else. I have never once heard her say she hates someone - except me, she said it to me - she tells me she is mad that soandso did x, y, or z, but she really wants to be friends with everyone. I love too that I was able to raise her to not be afraid of a skin color, wheelchairs, older people, people missing limbs, etc. she doesn't care about any of that. She cares if you smile and say "hello".

THAT I am most proud of.

And even though I am fat, I too have my hottie moments.

Jessica @ Wanting Adventure said...

I love this post! You are awesome.

I'm a fantastic event planner. I'm a detail person who can think about all aspects and really create an awesome environment - that's why they pay me the big bucks at the office. :)

Lisa said...

Girl, I am seriously impressed! I love this post.

And yes, I'm a jerk to myself. Easily my worst critic. Is it bad that I am reviewing your list to see what jumps out at me about what I like about myself? Sheesh. Ok, I have nice shoulders. I'm funny. I can type very quickly. Apparently I make gorgeous babies. ;) I really like doing nice things for others. I have a small waist.

Phew, what a list. That isn't everything, but everything I feel safe sharing.

Stacy Kaye said...

I really love this post...I love that you are saying how awesome you are. You ARE awesome!

This is going to be hard for me, but:
I have great hair, seriously...it looks good curly AND straight.
I am a really good friend that people want to be around.
I am a great mom, I have surprised myself by being more patient than I thought I would be in that area, which makes me proud.
I have good skin, and can get by without make up even though I usually wear it.
I am really good at complimenting my husband, ESPECIALLY when we are with others, and he does the same for me...I think our relationship is stronger because of it.

Hmm...I could really keep going with this! But I'll stop there. Thanks!

Anonymous said...

I love my brutal honesty, twisted sense of humor, fierce protectiveness and the ability to whip up a mean batch of nachos in under 15 minutes.

: )

Just A Normal Mom said...

AWESOME! Every woman should read this post! I for one, can take a good lesson from this!

Jennifer said...

I am always myself. I'm never fake. I like that about me.

Jackie said...

And this post is why I love you!

I do not always feel fabulous about myself.
Actually more often than not I feel pretty bad.

The only thing that rings true and true for me is that I do not regret. It is a waste of energy and not in the least bit productive. I just suck it up, bitch about it for a while and then move the hell on!

Lori said...

Great post M!!!

I love that I make my patients at work feel comfortable.
I love that I can make people smile and laugh.
I love that I only wear eye make up and get compliments on my skin.
I love that I'm a wife and a mommy.

deborah said...

sometimes i wonder why women do that, and then i think that perhaps they haven't had that kind of generosity in their lives. i don't know, for sure. but, i know that there is more than one pretty, more than one smart, more than one funny, more than one success. what i like? i am honest, kind, open, i see the good when nobody else can, i am loyal and messy. i like that people count on me and that i am sought out for solid advice. i am a mostly good momma. i like that i use my life for what is most important to me. i like me. i'm seeing that i like you too:)

Noƫlle said...

So I came across your blog via a Pinterest post on pretzel-rolo-pecans (btw oh my god yum)...

And I LOVE this post!

I love that I am a superhero... navigating life's crazy and awesome at the speed of light ;). Seriously, between being a mom of two and a student, a friend and a wife, and just a HUMAN BEING... I do feel like a superhero most days. Even when I eff it all up.

And it's awesome.

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