Triple Shot.

01 February 2012

I don’t know about you, but I believe the Universe works in mysterious ways.  It can bring two people together.  It can gently remind us things aren’t the way they should be.  And then, there is the big old slap in the face.

I don’t really do subtle, so this is usually the form that the Universe takes when speaking to me.

Monday, I texted Dave and asked him {again} to help me figure out the espresso machine.  It isn’t that I am an idiot really, but you all know I am spoiled, the Davester usually makes it for me.  Plus, he doesn’t like it when I break his stuff.  He called me and walked me through grinding the beans with his fancy pants grinder and making a double shot.  I whipped up a cup of hot cocoa {extra marshmallows} for Finnegan and an afternoon vanilla mocha for myself and then, I posted this on Twitter:


Yesterday, I hit my afternoon slump and decided that it was a triple shot kind of day.  I started whipping it up, the smugness permeating the vanilla latte.  Oh yeah.  I don’t need your help any more, Sucka.

Everything was coming up Millhouse. 

Until I tried to remove the thingy with the espresso powder in it.  {That, I think, is the technical term?}  It was stuck.

Shoot.  Do I call Dave? 

No way.

I push it, at which point the thing EXPLODES with a bang, shooting the still hot espresso powder everywhere.  It was on the floor, on the counter, on the tops of drawers, all over the machine, all over me.  It blew the metal basket holding the powder straight across the room and the plastic grate with it.  Finn came running from the other room when he heard the boom. 

Someone {Jess} really should have told me that Twitter has a direct line to the Universe, I might not have signed up for this.

espresso explosion 007

Apparently, Dave says, you need to wait five minutes for the pressure to subside and/or release the top thingy {also the technical term} so the pressurized steam can escape and NOT blow all over the kitchen. 

Which is WHY, Michelle, it was ‘stuck’ and not opening.

Thanks, Universe, I’ve got that now.  Loud and freaking clear.

And just to drive home the message a teeny bit more…  I cleaned off the counters of the insane amount of espresso powder {so VERY much powder everywhere} and bent down to clean it off the floor when riiiiiiip, a hole right in the butt of my beloved monkey pajamas.  Ok, ok, they are 10 years old and the flannel is so worn it is almost see through, but REALLY Universe?  Really?  The monkey pajamas?

I was going to take a picture of my butt, but Finn {rightly} said, “Mom, no one needs to see that.”

Drinking that triple shot of karma right now, Universe.  Thanks.  Thanks a freaking lot.

espresso explosion mug


Amy said...

So, your pajama pants blow out and you decide to just go naked for the rest of the day?!

Michelle said...

Yes! {Not really, I was wearing a tank!}

@JessEsco said...

Haha! I love you. And also? If you had just asked Twitter for help, you would've solved your problem asap. Half the time I don't even bother with Google.

Yostee said...

May your monkey PJs rest in peace. It's utter devastation when your most prized pants finally rip!!!

I have come to the conclusion that this is why Starbucks was invented. Anything that you can not just push a simple button to start is too much for me. We have a cappacino machine that has been sitting on our shelf for 5+ years b/c I can't figure the damn thing out.

Are you liking twitter?! I have played with the idea of joining a few times, but am not so sure I need another media outlet to suck the remaining time out of my day - I am a bit of a sucker for stuff like that!!!

AfGolden said...

LOL! I LOVE you posts!! I really do...always gives me a pick-me-up! :)

Just A Normal Mom said...

NOT the monkey pajamas!!! Only us bloggers will stop to take a picture of the mess. LOL Glad you eventually got your cup. :)

Anonymous said...

You most certainly pissed off the universe. he he

Unknown said...

are you naked in that pic?! HA!

Stacy Kaye said...

Oh my word! So hilarious! I wish I had time to check my Twitter feed during the day at work, then my students would wonder why I randomly burst into laughter. It would be your fault, you and your feed!

Ashley said...

See what you get for drinking in the middle of the day? Or is that just me?

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