Wardrobe Malfunction.

13 May 2013

I have this dress from Old Navy that I love.  LOVE.  It’s super soft and comfortable, but it’s still cute and it has these little cap sleeves so I can still wear a good bra with it.  Bonus because these tatas aren’t holding themselves up for sure.  It’s great with a little sweater or on it’s own.  It’s the perfect casual little black dress.

That is until it ends up over your head in the middle of downtown Toledo.

During a very busy Friday lunch hour.

In front of one of your very favorite restaurants that you frequent often. 

{Holla Grumpy’s, so sorry if I scared your lunching customers by my mortification and screaming.} 

The thing is, this dress, it has a little swing to it.  It’s part of the awesomeness.  Take note:  It also means that if you happen to walk over a grate you are going to Marilyn the heck out of yourself.  Obviously, I’m careful about that, but I certainly didn’t anticipate the gust of wind that showed everyone on the street my boy cut undies. 

I started screaming for my mom, who was carrying Tate to the car since my hands were full.  Who, helpfully, started laughing at me as I frantically tried to pull the dress down and {unsuccessfully} prevent it from flying up again with each gust of wind.

It was less Marilyn and more spastic thirty-something running down the street trying to get the car door open fast enough to jump inside while carrying a to go box and purse and keys and phone.

Hot.

Yeah, yeah, go ahead and laugh.  Tell me your worst wardrobe malfunction so I feel better.

 

{Seriously, if you ever have the occasion to be in Toledo, you need to partake in lunch at Grumpy’s even if it means seeing my rear end on the street out front.}

10 comments:

Samantha said...

Thank you for making me laugh out loud! I needed that to start my Monday off right :)

My biggest malfunction has been walking around with tags still on my clothes and not knowing it. You can almost guarantee that if I get something knew, there will be a tag lurking somewhere that I forget the first time I wear it.

Katie said...

Bwahaha! Thanks for starting my Monday off with a laugh - and the reminder of WHY I DON'T WEAR DRESSES! :o)

I think my biggest wardrobe malfunction would be wearing my underwear inside out - luckily it's something that only I have seen! And yes, it happens way more often than I'd like to admit.

Kelly @ turned UP to ELEVEN! said...

I am starting to think my husband IS a genius... he had asked why people the create fashion, namely dresses that flow UP, why they don't so light weights in the bottom of the hems FOR this reason. I told him that was crazy but after reading this... again he's a genius.

If it makes you feel better when I was a 20 something at the club, I ripped my jeans dancing by the pockets... my best friend thought it would be funny to rip them further.. .she ripped them over to the butt crack and down to the knee... yes, my whole entire half butt was hanging out AT THE CLUB and I was in a thong!!! ACK!!!!! We stayed there after that... I embraced the embarrassment and drank heavily after that.

Anonymous said...

I am sorry to day, I do not think I have ever had a wardrobe malfunction. On the other hand, there may have been on that is so horrible, that my subconscious has forever hidden it from me.

Unknown said...

Michelle, I seriously laughed my ass off - your mom. Oh, my god, so funny.

I'm so glad I'm not alone; wardrobe malfunction is my life partner. It started in first grade when the zipper of my zip-front t-shirt got stuck halfway down my chest and continues to this day. Just last week my black leggings developed a hole in the bottom that I didn't discover until that night, so everyone in town had a chance to check out the cute print on my undies. Its pretty awesome, as long as you're ok with the constant threat of embarrassment.

Just A Normal Mom said...

Your mom's reaction cracked me up. So far, so good - no malfunctions that anyone but me have seen. I suppose everyone has their moment and my time is coming, however...

Janet said...

Love me some Grumpy's!

Anonymous said...

OMG....so funny. I laughed so hard. What a great visual. I love the way you painted the picture in words. Grumpy's will never be the same!
Love you
Aunt Linda

Leslee @ This Friendly Life said...

Laughing hysterically over here! AAaahhhahaha! Thanks for sharing!

Rebecca G. said...

OMG I laughed out loud, Michelle! The same thing happened to me out on my back patio in front of my gas grill which matched the gas grill of our neighbors, and good friends, who lived behind us. Not only was the husband also out grilling, but he was having some nostalgic, college boy, laugh-out-loud, sophomoric, women-don't-want-to-know-what-we're-talking-about knee slapathon with his former frat buddy. Love him to death, but I'll never live it down, no pun intended!

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