Summer Guest Blogger Friday! Very Best Housewife!

Happy Friday morning to you!  Today's guest post is from a new-to-me blog Very Best Housewife.  VBH was blog hopping and found So Wonderful, So Marvelous and I'm glad she did.  We've been emailing about our mutual giving up Greys Anatomy for the Office and not being able to deal with the gawd awful heat of the south... we're yankee wimps, we know this.  She lives in New York state and in the midst of moving has decided to drop everything and do a guest post for you.... really I think she's just slacking off on the unpacking!  So go on over and visit VBH, you'll be happy that you did!


Oh my gosh you guys, SERIOUS butterflies goin' on right now.

Why, do you ask?

This is my FIRST guest post EVER!!! And I'm all kinds of ridiculous and nerdy so I get worked up about uh, EVERYTHING.

So, okay....let me wipe my clammy hands off and introduce myself. I am known around these parts as The Very Best Housewife. Maybe it's lame that I'm not telling you my name right now (Michelle knows it!), but after years of blogging and feeling conflicted I decided it was LAME to not post pictures for fear of being stalked so instead I just don't say names or places. However, you do get to know that I live in NY (and no, I don't mean the city). My husband and I just bought the second house of our marriage, and in it we house our extremely handsome 16 month old son and our extremely overweight cat.

I'm neurotic (as if you couldn't ALREADY tell??) and I blame it on two things. 1) I have an addictive personality and I kind of "collect" hobbies and 2) I have quite the over-active imagination so I'm afraid of almost everything, or assume the most ridiculous scenarios are the ones that will happen to me. (Actually...sometimes they do.) Because of that, my blogging is kind of ADD in terms of what I post - covering everything from "what's on my mind", to recipes, crafts, home decor, books, etc etc. Oh and Edward Cullen, because we are secret lovers.

That being so, I've had THE hardest time coming up with what to guest-post about.

Rather than sit here twiddling my thumbs trying to think of something, I decided to share with you my FAVORITE, EASY summer recipe. My husband & I love this - I make it constantly because it keeps well in the fridge for side dishes for lunches & dinners, and it's a great thing to bring to a picnic or summer get together!

I give you, The Very Best Housewife's Pasta Salad! (Did I mention it's super easy?)

You Need:
1 Package Tri-color Pasta
1 Bottle of Italian Dressing
1 "Brick" Mozzarella Cheese
1 Green Pepper
1 Crown of Broccoli
1 Container of Plumb or Cherry Tomatoes, halved
1 Can Black Olives, halved
1 Package Pepperoni, sliced in half
Parmesan Cheese & Pepper to taste

So, boil your pasta. While it's cooking, chop up everything else - green pepper, broccoli, tomatoes, olives, cheese, & pepperoni. When the pasta is done, drain and rinse it in COLD water (if you plan to eat it right away so it's not all warm and gross). Mix everything together, squeeze about 3/4 of the bottle of Italian dressing over it, and sprinkle parm cheese & pepper in to your liking.

That's it!!

You can chose to drop or add pretty much anything you want (though this is the "perfect" formula I've come up with after many years of playing with ingredients). It's super flexible and obviously EASY! It keeps well in Tupperware or even just a big serving bowl that's covered with plastic wrap or foil.

So, friends, there you have it.

How'd I do? Was that guest-posty enough? I hope so.

If you aren't totally afraid of me by now, come visit me at the Very Best Housewife :)

In A Name.

Earlier this week, I was reading a post over at Bower Power and Katie was talking about their fabulous weekend in Chattanooga, her son's first roadtrip and how her husband's mother and grandmother were still trying to decide their names.  It made me laugh because we went through something similar.

You see, when I was about 4 or 5 years old, I started calling my Grandma "Meme" all because my friend Jeff had a Mimi and I wanted one too.  Now, she has been Meme for thirty or so years and everyone calls her that, friends, her own children, her great-grandchildren.  It fits her perfectly.

We weren't super close with my dad's mother while growing up {about high school we seemed to get a lot closer} so we called her Grandma.  In junior high though, Lyndsey and I got a bug up our butt that she needed a name too.  So, she became GramCrackers.  One, she is admittedly a little crackers in the head.  Two, we thought it was so funny to say it.  She still gets a kick out of it, especially when her mailman questioned her about mail addressed to GramCrackers.

So when we had Finnegan, we weren't really sure how to refer to these newly minted grandparents.  Especially so with my parents who had me young and weren't typical grandparents. 

Dave's side of the family is much more traditional and his parents said they would be Grandma & Grandpa.  For awhile there Finn was calling Dave's mom Grandma SueSue, but I think she put the squash on that, now it's just Grandma. 

Dave's grandma was a different story,  Kelly is an absolute riot.  She told us that she would like to think of a name for him to call her and came up with Oma which is a German term of endearment similar to 'granny' and we got the biggest kick out of this.  So she is his Oma.

My mom has always been J-ma to Dylan & Bren {half Janet, half grandma} and to Ruby she was always Janet.  So we started referring to her as J-ma. For some reason Finn would call her J.G. and then it was just Gigi.  It was so funny too because Annabelle calls Nikki's mom G.G. too... it stands for Greedy Grandma because she always wanted to hold her.  Ha!  Finn & Annabelle think it's cool though that they both have a Gigi/GG.  We still aren't sure how he started calling my step-dad Papa.  Ruby calls Richard 'Grandpa Rico' and we don't know any other Papas so it must have been his own initiative.

My dad's name is the best I think.  For a long time and I am still not quite sure why, Finn couldn't say Grandpa so he would call both Dave's dad & my dad Bakka.  Once he was able to call Dave's dad Grandpa, it switched immediately, but he always still called my dad Bakka, which my dad liked.  It wasn't until he was about a year and a half old that my Aunt Letti was here and asked us WHY Finn was calling him cow... and we figured out pretty quickly that vaca {pronounced bakka} was the spanish word for cow.

So there you have it.  Meme.  GramCrackers.  Oma.  Grandpa & Grandma.  Papa & Gigi.  Bakka.  Our grandparently names.  What do you or your children call their grandparents?

Sex.

I'm guessing if you're related to me {or Dave} you are going to want to take a pass on this little here post of mine. 

Still here?  Let's jump right in then, shall we?

I used to sell sex toys for one of the home parties, it was a part time job and just about the most fun anyone can have making cash.  I spent most parties laughing hysterically at the stories I heard.  I got pregnant with Finnegan a month after I started.  Now, you know we were trying and had help, but the huge discount on all kinds of fun stuff?  I'm pretty sure all of the 'quality assurance' we were doing helped it along.

Gawd Mom, quit reading!

My point of telling you all this is that while I'm not an expert or sexpert, {ha! see how I did that?} by any means, the company I worked for did give us a whole lot of sexual health information.  I can tell your partner how to find your g-spot.  Don't do your Keegals?  You're the one who is going to be snissing {peeing when you sneeze} after having a baby, don't say I didn't warn you!  I can tell you which toy to introduce to the bedroom first because it's guaranteed to be smaller than he is and not threaten his manhood.

I can also tell you... the ladies you think would be completely offended by an invitation to a party are usually those who have the best time.

None of that is my point either though.   

My point is this...

Have.  Sex.  It's good for you.

Really.  Sounds simple, right? 

As a parent, or anyone really, it's too easy to put it by the wayside.  You're too tired, you have a headache, the kids were being nuts, work is stressing you out, you haven't shaved in a week, money is tight.  Excuses!  Get this... it'll help you sleep, rid you of your headache, the kids are asleep, work can wait until tomorrow, he could care less about your hairy legs and it is FREE.

Have sex. 

Go on.  Text your hubby that you can't wait to see him tonight.  It will make his day.

Oh, and happy hump day.

Finnisms

Bear with me peeps, I'm going to be that mom for a minute here because this kid, he is cute and he has been saying the funniest things lately.  And if I don't write them down, I will forget.

Finn: {To Dave who was eating thai for lunch} Now, I know you like pasta, but you need to choose something else.  {under his breath} Uhhhh blueberry toast.  We have cabbage.  MOM!  Do we have cabbage?


Finn:  Daddy, you're the BEST cooker.  In.  Da.  World.  I LOVE this dinner.
Dave:  Mommy made dinner, buddy.
Finn:  No, you did da meat.
Dave:  Nope, it was all Mommy.
Finn:  You ALL are the best cookers.


Finn: What's that on your arm?
Me:  It's a bandaid because I had bloodwork done.
Finn:  Why is that on there?
Me:  Because I went to the doctor and had blood taken.
Finn:  Ohhh!  Poor Mommy!
{runs off and grabs his docotor kit... comes back with a stethoscope}
Finn:  Mommy, please put your arm out.


Finn:  I've got fur on me.
Me:  Where?
Finn:  Right there.  {points to a few tiny hairs on his arm}
Me: That is hair.  We all have it on our arms.
Finn:  Daddy's hair is fuzzy.
Me:  Yep.
Finn:  Why? 
Me:  Because guys have more hair than girls do.  When you get big like your daddy, you'll have a lot of hair too.
Finn:  I don't want to get big and fuzzy.


Dave:  You need to take a nap.
Finn:  I don't want to take a nap.
Dave:  Well you can either screw around or you can get into bed, take a nap, and come with me to pick up the poodle {from the groomer which strangely fascinates Finn} when you wake up.
Finn:  {smirking}  I want to screw around.
Dave:  Maybe we shouldn't say screw around, maybe we should say mess around.  You're taking a nap.
Finn:  Eh, I want to screw around.